My Funeral

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Posted by pancho from ? ( on Tuesday, April 02, 2002 at 8:49AM :

I'm looking forward to it. I can just about see, in my mind's black eye, the scene. People will come from all around to blubber and weep...some in relief, others in mock turtle sorrow. I will be remembered as one who had great promise...but failed to live up to his "gratness". Somehow or other it will come out at the oration, that I was killed by a Muslim, just as happened in Simele.

There will be a photo of me, framed in black on whatever passes for an altar at the Heathen Temple where my remains will be on view. My family will have to look long and hard to find one without that "smirk" I was so often singled out for by pickled teachers who couldn't find out who actually "did it"...but chose me because I looked like I had just done it.

People will solemnly come forward to relate an anecdote or two...about how I was honest, when I had to be...kind, when someone was looking...cheerful when contemplating another's discomfort. I'll be an all around great guy dead. People who were uncomfortable in my presence will cozy up to my corpse and wonder what they'd been so afraid of.

Can't wait

-- pancho
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