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=> Re: Qasrani, I can't believe that you didn't like these reviews

Re: Qasrani, I can't believe that you didn't like these reviews
Posted by Habibi (Guest) - Saturday, July 10 2004, 17:16:28 (CEST)
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I'm so disappointed. That's all I can say. I've had my own experiences with women who were rude toward me, as well - viewing me as competition at work, blah, blah, blah. Don't become like one of them. If a man had written those reviews, maybe you'd have given them a chance. If those reviews had appeared in Harper's, you'd have relished them. Of maybe you're just being defensive. I mean, for god's sake - they're just book reviews.

I've had experiences with positive women, too. They really do exist. I'd rather be like one of them than the other kind.

And our argument isn't a case of the "haves" vs. the "have nots." I was raised in an upper middle class family - we had multiple homes, us kids had multiple music classes, art and music camps, and language schools to attend as well as private school.... The thing is that my parents, who both worked really hard to provide all this for us, made us realize that we were lucky. They didn't want us to grow up too spoiled, so instead of hiring a maid, the kids cleaned and did things around the house. Though we had indoor heating, my dad insisted on using a wood stove to heat the house on some winter days, and so we leared what it was like to chop wood. My parents locked up the TV, my mom talked openly about her troubles with her male colleagues at work so that us girls would understand what she was going through and know more about how this world works. My mom, instead of throwing everything away in the trash, recycled and composted, showing us kids that the things we throw away can be minimized and actually put to good use in the garden. If we saw an animal hit on the road, if it was still alive, we took it to a vet, if it was dead, we moved it over to the grass because my mom believed that animals' bodies were sacred, too, and shouldn't be subject to such humiliation. My dad preached to us about why homeless people were homeless in this country and that we were lucky we weren't homeless. My parents donated all of the things they could to people who needed these things, even buying expensive things for families they knew who were in a rough condition so the kids in those families didn't feel so poor. In other words, my parents were really practical, having lived through difficult times, themselves, and they didn't want their kids to take anything for granted. They could have used their money and time for other things, like luxury cruises and posh vacations, but they thought that those things were vulgar, in themselves, that it was vulgar to ignore people and animals in need.... The point is - they taught me not to take ANYTHING for granted. I'm lucky. Other people aren't, and I should try to help those people out who aren't. If something bad happens to you, it's probably worse for the other people around you, who don't have it as lucky as you.

I admire you, Qasrani, for everything that you are working toward and accomplishing. I wish you the most success in your life that it is possible for you to attain. I'm letting the subject go, now, like you requested. I know you're better than what you sound like in our argument. I just know you are.



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