Posted by pancho from ? (64.79.4.3) on Friday, March 22, 2002 at 9:12AM :
I lay in bed last night reading the things I have been charged with by Jackie. I guess I was wrong...she would lie and sign to it as the truth. I didn't think she was that determined...that low. Someone told me I had no idea how unhinged she has become over this. She had ambitions that she was using our community for. Just as she used the Shumirum to enhance her profile among the powers that be in San Jose.
It was very cost effective for her to spend whatever she did on "us". The return was enormous in the good will and status she was buying for herself. And as the poet says, if she benefitted us only a little from the lot of benefit she derived from using us...that would be something good too. But the sum total of the benefit we will ultimately derive...aside from the few bucks she will "lavish" on us...will be very little in the long run. We tried to do something for ourselves...to work and raise money to place public monuments...only to have Nimrod and then Jackie come along and try to take them over for their own benefit primarily. If we never do anything, then I suppose crumbs from the tables of these people will be "something". But it isn't worth it when we see them willing to trash our own efforts in order to maintain themselves in whatever status they think they have. If they were interested in us and the Heritage, they would help these projects along and not ruin them when they see themselves eclipsed...or unnecessary.
She claims that the $6000 her husband gave for the Hammurabi was a loan...one which I promised to repay promptly and which she demanded I repay on several occasions...which I never did. I never borrowed money from her or anyone else. Why would I when I have sculpture to sell...when she has several thousand dollars of sculptures of mine in her home? And if that were all true, why did she buy the small lamasu after I steadily "refused" to pay her back? Why throw good money after bad? And if I'm not mistaken she bought another piece from me in the time since this alleged loan was made and all her "demands for repayment went unheeded". In any case she has no document and as they say it is a classic "he said, she lied" situation.
I am accused of slandering her by claiming she made physical intimate advances to me...well, she did. What I am I supposed to have done...gone along? Kept quiet about it? If she did something, the slander is in her action, not my mentioning it. This is what we do in our community...cover up everyones peckerdillos in order to maintain appearances...let someone like the Jackster know the next time that someone might come forward and tell what happened...that's why she is willing to lie about this stuff...to put her image back together...the substantive rot beneath the surface needs to be protected, tucked back underneath the surface so she can go on doing what she has to others and get away with it.
The image of the people who have confided in me, all standing back in "fear" of what this hellion might do to them is sickening. I can't believe that we are Assyrian in any way when I see how fearfull and cowardly, how cringing and fawning we have become.
One of the things that she alleges is that I called her a "woman scorned". I did...big fucking deal. Then she says she rejected advances BY ME! Now don't that beat all!!! I am supposed to have made a play for HER!!! Talk about your wishful thinking. I mean...have you guys SEEN her?
Then I am being accused of saying she runs her organization like her own personal "club" and this has caused her anguishdoodles. I am accused of all sorts of things too...saying she has "intimidated" people...well she HAS...they told me so and I believe them cause they looked absolutely petrified when they told me. They indeed ammended their bylaws to allow her to be president a second term...and she did say in front of witnesses that she would be sending me an application which has yet to arrive. And she certainly breeched her duties because she did not inform her club members of the letter from the lawyer...or give her reasons for revoking the "invitation"...just told them I was a "trouble-maker". You realize how many Banana Republic Cops have used that as all the justification they needed?
I said she dangled her ass out there and she DID! All I have to do is ask her to stand up and turn around...how the hell we gonna prove that her ass is NOT hanging out there? Is there a standard of measurement I don't know about? Is there a rule of thumb or Law about how many inches past the back of someone's dimpled knees said ass has to protrude before it can be legally said to be "hanging"? Is there a formula that compares a person's height to the distance their butt is from the ground by the square root of their hypoteneuse to determine if their arse is "hanging"? For this stuff the courts have time???
If I say "I thought" she wanted me to grab her...and we were together alone on enough occasions...why isn't that acceptable speech? The Constitution guarantees no one protection from the consequences of their horniness or lack of discretion. To be slanderous my comments would have to cause her real harm and be made with the KNOWLEDGE that they were untrue. People don't usually make passes at someone in front of witnesses...by the very nature of such a thing it happens in private. I merely related my strong impressions of an incident that occured...if there were no witnesses I can't help that. I am not the one bringing charges of making lewd suggestions against her...in which case the burden of proof would be on me....she is charging me with saying things that are NOT TRUE...let her prove she never did these things. Just because she was discrete...is no reason for me to have to keep my mouth shut so she can feel free to do more of the same.
She claims these comments cause injury to her reputation...well of course they do...just as doing them in public would. That she has enough sense to do them privately doesn't excuse them. Would a child molester operate in broad daylight...do people arrange trysts in public? How I injured her ocupation I'll never know...I doubt people wouldn't buy stuff from her because she flirts and makes advances. She says these comments cause her to be "shunned" or "avoided". Funny...these are exactly the things she set out to do to me...and for no good reason except that I frustrated HER in these very things she did to ME. No wonder no one believes any of this...we are really unbelievable!!!
-- pancho
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