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=> Assyrian Gets Saved

Assyrian Gets Saved
Posted by parhad (Guest) - Friday, January 23 2004, 17:30:22 (EST)
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An Assyrian was swimming at a beach about thirty feet from shore when the Christian Lifeguard noticed him. "I`ll save you!", the Christian yelled and he grabbed his oars and put to sea in the fishing boat he kept there to save people with.

The Assyrian turned at the first shout to witness the Lifeguard valiantly straining at the oarlocks as he pushed his sleek boat over the crests of the waves out to where the Assyrian was standing, knee deep in the tepid waters.

Thinking the Lifeguard would surely come to a halt the Assyrian turned back to gaze out at the horizon to where a flock of flying fish were grazing along the blue green waters.

But the Lifeguard didn`t stop...he rowed furiously right into the Assyrian knocking him into an oncoming wave that washed a good part of itself down his throat...he surfaced coughing and spitting to see beside him the Lifeguard beating at the waters with his heavy oar and crying all the while, "No need to move for I will save you!".

A blow from the oar struck the Assyrian in the temple and as the water closed over him he saw the Lifeguard leap over the side and felt the heavy thud of his body landing on his injured head and driving his spine into the sandy bottom. The next sensation he was aware of was of the roots of his hair screaming in pain as he felt himself jerked off the bottom and came shooting up only to smack his head on the bottom of the fishing boat and pass out.

When he came to he was being pulled by a rope tied to his ankles with the other end looped over a hook aft the fishing boat. As buckets of water washed over his face making it difficult to breathe he noticed he was being pulled out to sea. As the Assyrian never understood the nature of this attack, that it was meant to be a rescue instead, he had the distinct impression he was being taken out to be drowned...why he couldn`t begin to guess. Between the lumps on his head, his aching scalp and the blood clouding his vision in between waves washing into his gasping mouth and the shooting pain from his pinched ankles the Assyrian felt he was as close to death as a person needed to get.

They continued this way for some time, the Lifeguard pulling manfully at the oars and shouting back over the breeze..."Don`t say anything, I`ll save you!"

After what seemewd like an hour they arrived back at the point the Lifeguard had first put to sea from and the Assyrian felt the rocks and sand scrape along his back as the Lifeguard ran the boat up onto the beach far enough to bury the Assyrian`s head in sand up to his shoulders.

Seeing this the Lifeguard leaped heroically from the boat and from some side pocket somewhere produced a shovel with which he proceed to furiously remove the sand encasing the Assyrian`s head. Once free the Assyrian grabbed at the bleeding stumps where his ears had been and the Lifeguard, ever alert to Life`s little opportunities, retrieved the the severed ears and placed them between the Assyrians lips for safekeeping.

Grabbing the rope that was still attached to the ankles of the Assyrian the Lifeguard undid the other end from the boat and proceeded to drag the Assyrian up the beach over rocks and broken shells and bottles till they came to a sheltered spot that was safe. At least that`s what the Lifeguard said when he dropped the rope that had been cutting off circulation to the poor Assyrian`s feet for the last hour at least.

Alas the feet had to be amputated and the ears never did take and the Assyrian today has a constantly startled look on account of his scalp having been lifted a few inches resulting in eyes rather more open than would be desired under ordinary circumstances. After a little inquiry it was discovered that the Assyrian lived nearby and was used to wading in the water daily. The Christian Lifeguard, being new to the area didn`t know that and so he saved the Assyrian from drowning...which is what he tells everyone, the Assyrians included.

To this day the Assyrian sits in his wheelchair by the sea, unable to do much...but the Lifeguard comes by daily to chat and bring some food and talk over old times when he saved the Assyrian. And the Assyrian considers himself lucky to this day that he never needed rescue again...that he never could swim again past that last day, nor walk nor do much of anything else because one more rescue like that and he`d be dead for sure.



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