Method In Madness

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Posted by pancho from ? ( on Wednesday, February 27, 2002 at 8:28PM :

Just what is it I hope to accomplish here?

I remember waiting outside John Darrah's office in Seattle years ago. He was head of the Public Defender's Organization. He reminded me a lot of Old Abe...Lincoln that is. We got pretty friendly as I went to volunteer at their Juvenile section. He invited me and one of my resident hoodlums to go up to his log cabin by a lake north of Seattle. The guy was building it the old fashioned getting your skull cracked. The only modern tool he used was a chain saw, and an old and rambunctious one at that...and then only because he didn't have the time to hack away with a dull axe, which he also had.

So we helped chop some and ran when he started that old man-eating saw up. We winched some logs together and hoisted others up to the roof. he took us out in his leaky rowboat and wanted us to fish. I've never found an animal worthy of killing besides humans, and you can't eat them, so I passed. I think he was hurt when I refused to take the trout he caught for us back to the other adorable criminals who were living with me then at our Group Home.

John stood by me when the US Parks Department got mad at me because I let the kids in my first camp smoke weed and screw each other, up there in the woods where Smokey the Bear lives. I figured if that's what they did when in the "custody" of the State...why should I stop them. Anyway John had fired off a letter back to the guy who ran the National Parks for the Northwest...said I was a great guy in his book for getting twenty kids out of jail for the summer...that I'd wangled the supplies from Army surplus, the US Army that is and on and on...ending with a nice flourish. I think we even got some kind of acknowledgement back.

So one day I'm sitting in the waiting room of his office (he's a judge now up there) and his secretary, a very lovely lady who was having a torrid you know what, ahem...started telling me how wonderful I was and how she thought I was GREAT and so much more wonderfulazloozle than ordinary humans...and just before she swooned, I told her to stop...told her what I was trying to do was nothing...and that she and he and you and everyone else could easily do the same "nothing" I was...but then maybe if we all chipped in, we might accomplish something. She didn't appreciate my getting off the pedestal she was trying so hard to shove me up onto...where I would be safely beyond the emulation of mere mortals. I got right back down and basically and me is the same, lady...stop trying to excuse yourself from doing anything because it takes GODS to care about hurting children.

What we don't need is people hurting for hurting children...hurting just enough so at the end of the day they think they REALLY got hurt and need to take a break and go grab a beer and get gloriously laid. You ain't done nuthin lady...not a damn thing.

Flourishes of wit and tears satisfy you...and no one else. No one can eat your tears...or get bandaged with them...or swallow them for medicine. They only satisfy you.

-- pancho
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