Dear Sadie


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Posted by Warrior Empress from host-65-199-130-90.link.com.eg (65.199.130.90) on Wednesday, July 02, 2003 at 3:28PM :

Dear Sadie,

I would love to get your email address, as I don't know if all our personal rantings are particularly appreciated on a news posting site! Also, although only a few people post on here and it seems like a really intimate space, I am sure there are many who simply just come on for a browse and I guess being a private person (who secretly craves public attention and shock value no doubt), I would prefer sharing with you in private emails...ok?

Or alternatively, my email is warriorempress@maktoob.com. I would love to hear from you...

As for Cairo I have been living here the past year but have decided to go back home to Sydney...I miss Thai food, my friends, foreign films with English subtitles, the art annexe, my family, efficiency, and rain.

And as for the female lead vocalist in Evanessence (how rude we don't even know her name!), she does not seem like a depressed or depraved or desperate woman. On the contrary, I admire her strong vocals that seem to express an inner wisdom and realisation of human desire and pain.

Sometimes when we are in touch with our humanity, we realise the dark, hungry spaces within. When we can shift our focus from genitalia and political/ gender issues to more philosophical or psychological ones like the human soul. We can see/ sense an underlying commonality and ceaseless yearning that tears our hearts apart. We have all felt it...

People explain this disattachment differently, Freudean's sexually, Marxists socio-politically, religionists spiritually.

Lacan's work, and even some of Jung's speak of a "mirror phase" (you can do a search on this subject if you're interested) talk about infant psycho-sexuality. That when a feoutus (sp.?) develops in the womb, it knows no seperation, and humans are born dependant. When the baby is born she is (ideally) suckled and actually has no conceptualisation that she is seperate from her primary caretaker. She mimics the face of her mother because she thinks it is her own. Not only until she crawls or walks, or when she is left to cry and no one rescues her does this infant realise, she is seperate, she is whole separate and away from any being or any thing.

Then comes the mirror phase, the reaffirmation of separation. The child and then adult (we develpp at different rates I guess ha!) becomes fascinated by its appearance in the mirror and the realisation that she is her own entity. Some say chain smokers and those who suck on pens have not come to terms with this seperation....but I digress...

I won't delve deeply into this subject not only because I am no psychology expert, but also coz it may take up too much of your time. But hopefully you get my basic argument (and sorry if I am not eloquent in my speech and diction).

I have written alot about this primary psycho-sexual moment (crisis? trauma? realisation?) and related it to the alienation of the worker ala Marx and the desperate, craving need for identification and re-attachment of indigenous minority groups around the globe (eg assyrians/ palestinians/ kurds and others) ala Michael Ignatieff and others.

Craving for a whole, a purpose, a meaning, a home, a space, an understanding, a God, a screw, a name...is intrinsic to human need and psycho-sexual desire. Having a name is an important identification process and allows the human to conquer the mirror phase and begin to interact as an independant person (ofcourse there are flaws with the whole notion of independence but anyways...), it happened to me when I found out my real name (Majidi) and I think it will happen to Assyrians too....

And for that reason I like Evanessence :) ha!

Shlameh o khooba,
Empress xoxoxox

-- Warrior Empress
-- signature .



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